Ranking Golden Knight Trade Candidates Based On... Wing Spiciness

So you're the Golden Knights. You just beat arguably the best team in the Eastern Conference in the Boston Bruins, 2-1. It was an overtime thriller where the Bruins defense collapsed, leaving Mark Stone to feed Alex Pietrangelo for the winning goal. T-Mobile is a-rockin' and everyone's feeling good.

However, that doesn't change the fact that they've been average in their last 20 games heading into Thursday's game against Boston.

Granted, an array of injuries plays a major role in that. Losing Shea Theodore, William Karlsson, and Adin Hill (to name a few) can devastate a team. In fact, it can cause you to lose your grip on the Pacific Division, with the Vancouver Canucks overtaking you.

So what's a team to do? Rest on their laurels and do nothing? Not the defending champs. They need to look at making a move. While cap space might be tough to come by, the Golden Knights have no choice but to improve.

With that, we're going to look at trade candidates for the Golden Knights based on... wing spiciness. The spicier the wing, the spicier the trade (and more absurd). Here's where each trade candidate ranks on the spiciness scale.

1. Ranch

For the ranch flavor, we have to go the midwest, home to everything encompassing the flavor. Now I don't think you'll find Jonatan Berggren covered in ranch (that'd be weird). But you'll find he's a common trade candidate across the board.

It's no secret Detroit's been looking for someone to acquire his services. After all, his entry-level contract expires after this season. He's also cheap ($925,000) and young (23 years old), making him a nice depth piece.

3. Garlic Parmesan

It's surprising that a playoff contender like Philadelphia could have two trade candidates on here, yet here we are. It's as surprising as Gritty winning a marathon. Still, Nick Seeler is on the list and could be a cheap option for Vegas ($775,000).

Seeler does everything you'd want from a defenseman. He blocks shots (fifth in the NHL with 111), isn't afraid to get his hands dirty, and makes the necessary plays. You can also put him on the left side on defense or the right, adding to his versatility. The Golden Knights are tight on cap space, so this would be an excellent move for Vegas.

4. BBQ

For Frank Vatrano to be on the Vegas Golden Knights would make sense. He's a winger in his prime (29) and would be locked in for one more season after. He already has 20 goals this season and doesn't have a move clause, making him a nice target.

The Massachusetts native also has a tangy style on the power play. With seven power play goals this season (15th in the NHL), you can count on Vatrano adding some flavor to the Golden Knights if acquired.

5. Sweet Chili

Teams like the Colorado Avalanche are going to look at Sean Monahan. He's been a decent offensive talent (11 goals, 13 assists) and can be a cheap depth piece that adds a kick for any hockey team. That's why Kelly McCrimmon should be incentivized to go after him.

Monahan is also a nice addition to the power play, for he's contributed plenty for Montreal (five power play goals, six power play assists). The center would be an ideal fit for a Golden Knights team looking for depth pieces. Plus, you'd poach a talent away from a Western Conference rival. Sweet!

6. Medium

I've covered why the Golden Knights should go after Ilya Lyubushkin in previous writings. Vegas has a problem with allowing too many shots, which tests their goaltending. The defenseman knows how to clog shooting lanes and make opposing forwards uncomfortable, making him a good fit.

Plus, you can look into extending the 29-year-old if he's a terrific fit, a la Ivan Barbashev. Like his fellow Russian, Lyubushkin is a physical specimen. He loves to lay out people when he can (a nice number of 69 hits), given his frame (6'2", 201 lbs.).

7. Frank's Red Hot

Vegas has struggled with stopping shots from going through this season. So it makes sense that there would be interest in Christopher Tanev. Ironically, he fits the "Frank's Red Hot'" category, for he's tied for third in the NHL in blocked shots (118). He puts that s*** on everything.

But there are some caveats to this. Tanev does have a modified no-trade clause, which might complicate things. The defenseman's also 34 years old, which would add another older player on the Golden Knights.

8. Honey Sriracha Buffalo

The Vegas Golden Knights and Buffalo Sabres have done business together before, with Jack Eichel at the center of it all. But what if Casey Mittlestadt was sent over? You can count on the center on the power play and as a pure offensive talent, after all.

However, Buffalo might not want to take the spicy route and trade Mittlestadt away. The center is due for a long-term extension and the Sabres are still in their development phase. It's safe to say the Minnesota native won't likely be going anywhere anytime soon.

9. BWW Blazin'

A funny thing about these Flames candidates is most, if not all, of them are on one-year deals. That includes Noah Hanifin, who's like Tanev, only younger (26). Plus, the Boston native can move the puck up and down effortlessly, combining this talent with his excellent skating ability.

The Flames would like some draft picks in the deal, which Vegas can provide. Since McCrimmon is looking to go younger, Hanifin would be an ideal fit for an extension. That's especially true since Alec Martinez (36) is going to be a free agent next season.

10. Ghost Pepper

The distinction of ghost pepper flavor goes to the spiciest candidate of all. How fitting is it that it would be a Calgary Flame, Elias Lindholm. The Flames center is set to become a free agent after this season and is due $4.85 million for the season. It remains to be seen if Kelly McCrimmon will bite on this.

But for an injury-riddled Golden Knights team, the Swedish center can do it all. He can be a Selke Trophy candidate who knows how to play both ends of the ice. Not only that, but he's great on special teams, which has eluded Vegas in recent memory. It's worth trying, even if it stings the roof of the mouth.